The "Mommy" Wars
It seems like the last month or so, all I "hear" about online is "Mommy" Wars. * Breastfeeders VS. Bottle Feeders. *SAHM VS Working Moms. *"Veteran" Moms VS New Moms. *Cloth Diapering VS Disposables. *Moms VS Women who choose to not Procreate. When did parenting become a sport? It has even boiled over into Women VS Women. Can't we all just get along? Why do we as women feel the need to not only belittle each other but see it as socially acceptable?
I was reading The Bloggess the other day and saw that she had been on CNN, to talk about the Hillary Rosen/Ann Romney dispute. Which I actually think it is kind of funny. If you haven't heard {cause who has time to watch the news when you have kids?} Mitt Romney has been saying "well my wife thinks this is economically important to woman or my wife says this about the economy..." To which Hilary Rosen said "What does Ann Romney know about the economy? She has never worked a day in her life" Now being a SAHM is a lot of work so Hilary never should have said that but my thought is really what do any politicians know about us Americans? MOST come from old money, and have never worked a real job {I'm talking McDonald's here not working as a Senator.. Just saying} When have they ever had to worry about making ends meet? But I digress. WOMEN STOP BASHING EACH OTHER TO MAKE YOUR HUSBANDS LOOK BETTER!!!!
I see all these posts about "Tips for First Time Moms" and "What to expect After the Hospital" and guess what they are all a load of BS!! Here is the only thing first time Moms need to know: Do whatever works for you! And don't feel guilty if your original plan doesn't work. Breast feed if that works if not use formula and bottles. My first 3 kids were bottle fed, my last 2 were breastfed 10 months and 2+ years. Which was better? Depends. There are pros and cons to both. Breastfeeding can be extremely painful for the first few months but it is so nice to be able to roll over and feed the baby instead of getting up and making a bottle. But it is a pain to pump and have bottles if you want to go out without the baby.
It is also important to remember that what works for 1 child may not work for the others. Blake hardly ever slept if he could hear adults up and awake. Kayla could sleep through anything and even napped in her room. The 2 little boys nap in the living room and all but Mason sleep in their room. Mason at almost 3 still sleeps at least part of the night in my bed. But I don't mind because he is cuddly and I know that soon enough he will be big and not want to sleep with us.
I have been a SAHM and I have been a working Mom and I am currently a Working with Children at the Shop MOM {yeah it's real fun}. If I had plenty of money and could do whatever I wanted, I would be a SAHM. Mostly cause I don't have to wear pants, well real pants, I still wear yoga pants at home. It is hard work, but it is still easier than leaving your kids, working and then coming home at night to parent. But for some people that is the perfect mix of adult interaction and then being with their kids at night.
I think we as women need to stop judging others and let everyone have the same privileges we expect: to make our own choices. We have all made mistakes so instead of complaining about the single mom with kids who are in front of you in line at Walmart having meltdowns, maybe offer assistance or even a kind word. Life isn't a war and contrary to popular belief, we are all on the same side. Life isn't about doing things the "right" way but about doing them the way that works best for you. And remember at the end of the day, if you have healthy happy kids, and a great relationship with your spouse, then nothing else matters. ♥ Love Wins ♥
I was reading The Bloggess the other day and saw that she had been on CNN, to talk about the Hillary Rosen/Ann Romney dispute. Which I actually think it is kind of funny. If you haven't heard {cause who has time to watch the news when you have kids?} Mitt Romney has been saying "well my wife thinks this is economically important to woman or my wife says this about the economy..." To which Hilary Rosen said "What does Ann Romney know about the economy? She has never worked a day in her life" Now being a SAHM is a lot of work so Hilary never should have said that but my thought is really what do any politicians know about us Americans? MOST come from old money, and have never worked a real job {I'm talking McDonald's here not working as a Senator.. Just saying} When have they ever had to worry about making ends meet? But I digress. WOMEN STOP BASHING EACH OTHER TO MAKE YOUR HUSBANDS LOOK BETTER!!!!
I see all these posts about "Tips for First Time Moms" and "What to expect After the Hospital" and guess what they are all a load of BS!! Here is the only thing first time Moms need to know: Do whatever works for you! And don't feel guilty if your original plan doesn't work. Breast feed if that works if not use formula and bottles. My first 3 kids were bottle fed, my last 2 were breastfed 10 months and 2+ years. Which was better? Depends. There are pros and cons to both. Breastfeeding can be extremely painful for the first few months but it is so nice to be able to roll over and feed the baby instead of getting up and making a bottle. But it is a pain to pump and have bottles if you want to go out without the baby.
It is also important to remember that what works for 1 child may not work for the others. Blake hardly ever slept if he could hear adults up and awake. Kayla could sleep through anything and even napped in her room. The 2 little boys nap in the living room and all but Mason sleep in their room. Mason at almost 3 still sleeps at least part of the night in my bed. But I don't mind because he is cuddly and I know that soon enough he will be big and not want to sleep with us.
I have been a SAHM and I have been a working Mom and I am currently a Working with Children at the Shop MOM {yeah it's real fun}. If I had plenty of money and could do whatever I wanted, I would be a SAHM. Mostly cause I don't have to wear pants, well real pants, I still wear yoga pants at home. It is hard work, but it is still easier than leaving your kids, working and then coming home at night to parent. But for some people that is the perfect mix of adult interaction and then being with their kids at night.
I think we as women need to stop judging others and let everyone have the same privileges we expect: to make our own choices. We have all made mistakes so instead of complaining about the single mom with kids who are in front of you in line at Walmart having meltdowns, maybe offer assistance or even a kind word. Life isn't a war and contrary to popular belief, we are all on the same side. Life isn't about doing things the "right" way but about doing them the way that works best for you. And remember at the end of the day, if you have healthy happy kids, and a great relationship with your spouse, then nothing else matters. ♥ Love Wins ♥
Well said! It would be incredible if women could get along and support each other! It takes a village to make a great world for these little ones!
ReplyDeleteThanks Lori!!
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